Saturday, March 14, 2009

Budak hitam itu dan kisahnya....

Aku dah kuar dari meeting, cari toilet dulu sambil ngelak dari jalan sesama dia ni. Biar aku jauh2 dari dia.. malas nak tengok muka dia.. sakit ati aku... terguris sejak insiden dia tak reti nak gurau.. macamlah dia tak tau aku... mmg kaki gurau.. pastu kisah masa lepas farewell Rahim hari tu.. dibuatnya aku ni macam org tak bertanggungjawablah konon.. i guess dia dah taulah yg aku bengang, why dont she just accept it, kan? Tak.. nak jugak buat penyelesaian.. apa lagi???

Dia tunggu aku katanya, (malas nak cakap, but since dia cakap dulu, aku katalah "kenapa pulak..?

Dia hangin..

Dia hampir jerit kat aku depan lif "Tadi tu what i told you, i was just informing you about work.. you shouldnt say "so what"!"

Terkejut jugak aku.. aku jawab.
."I didnt say "so what", i just said "so?" .. i can still remember.."

Lambat pulak lif ni....
Dia kata "You want everybody to know that we are fighting ke kak?
I really respected you, you know.. " ini dicakap dgn nada marah & geram.. past tense tu, maknanya?..

(Aik, budak itam ni, marah aku pulak?)

I have to say this, "Sudahlah, i malas dah. It's okay. Kalu i ada buat salah, i mintak maaflah ye?" ... hopefully this would stop the conversation..

She still not satisfied and said "No, it's not okay, kak .. bla bla bla bla and blah...."

(i just apoligized, sudahlah, tak, tak puas hati lagi nih).

My last words to her "I do my work, you do yours, if you cannot stand talking to me, you can email me.. "

Dila dalam lif terdengar kot, entahlah, i was walking to our office when i said that.

(Tahan diri dari marah lagi, be cool hati.., dia ni sakit sikit and also she's got lots and lots of personal problems at home... I just wonder kalu dia betui2 nak bebaik, why cant she just say it nicely and slowly like a normal mature person, without being sooo angry like that.. ini ke kata2 seorang pakar motivasi, pakar kaunseling... kepada seorang kawan?)

So, i've concluded here.. dia bukannya nak berbaik kalu gitu cara approachnya. Dan diapun bukannya jadi apa2 kalu tak bergurau senda or masuk dalam senarai kawan baik aku. Biarlah kawan2 aku sikit, asalkan mereka semua berkualiti dan menghargai aku sebagai aku..

Biarlah aku ketepikan dia, kalu pada dia aku ni asik nak menyusahkan dia, saingan dia kot ... heheh.. aku ni takde keje lain ke asyik nak mengata umpat dia... lantaklah. As long as i know where i stand. If you feel you are good, than, be it lah.. i really dont care that much, i've done my part as a fren before. Just dont try to interfere with my life anymore or my work, and, jangan nak buat citer tak baik pasal aku pulak merata2. Eh, that one also without my control.. kan?

Aku tak rugi perpuluhan satu senpun without you. Tuhan itu Maha Tahu dan Maha Kaya dan aku berlindung denganNya!

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